You Bare My Mark ( My Mate Series) novel Chapter 145

09 - Chapter Nine - Leno's Point Of View. 

Diego threw the glass mug at me. The smoke scent of anger was all that could be smelt all through our home when I confessed. I ducked from the first mug but got nailed by the second one. I deserved that and I knew it. He was livid and I could understand that. He was going to be so volatile for so long and I had made my bed and I knew now I could only lay in it. 

"Diego, please I did it for you."

"You did it for yourself. You took advantage of me well I was drunk," he screamed punching the wall beside him. He was so fucking angry.

All thought the truth the way he put it made me even more disgusted with myself. I didn't know it was even possible to feel more disgusted. Vomit crawled up my throat. I rushed to the bathroom and let it loose. Diego grabbed me by the hair and pulled me towards the back door of our home. His next words made me nearly sick again.

"Bad fucking dogs don't get to come into the house until they learn to behave."

He opened the back door and threw my ass outside. He slammed the door and you could hear the lock click into place. I could feel his anger and shock as well as many other emotions flooding through the bond. His emotions nearly took my breath away. If I was feeling it this bad I could only imagine how he was actually feeling. The bond was fizzling with pure anger and it made me want to find a hole somewhere to die in. Sitting there I was pretty sure freezing to death would be a pretty peaceful way to go.

Things were going to be horrible from here on out. I knew things were never going to be what they honestly could have been, but I let my stupid good intentions get in the way. Now I was going to face the consequences, no matter how bad they were. The strange thing was, I could have left the house and just went to my father's but I didn't think I would be able to even look him in the eyes. He would be so disappointed in my horrible actions.

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"I can't.... goddess please no, I can't do it!"

He grabbed my face and made me look at him. His eyes were so angry and destructive, they didn't hide their feelings. Regret pounded into the center of my chest making my eyes tear and some flow down my face and touch Diego's fingers. He pulled away like he had been burned. That was the worst part. He pulled away from me as I had burned him. I was nothing to him.

"You don't get to cry. You chose to do it. Live with it."

He was right. I had chosen to do it and I did have to live with it, but how long could I live with the disgusting thing I had done to him weighing me down. if it was this bad now surely it would only get worse with time and I would find one day I wouldn't be able to handle what I had done to my own mate. What would I do then? That was the question. I had taken advantage of my own mate and all on the premise that I was doing it for him, but was I really doing it for him? Maybe I was doing it for myself.