Conrad and Jefferson didn't say anything, just staring at me with a creepy kind of calm.
I clumsily raised my head, my brain seemingly failing to catch up as I asked, "Don’t you guys know?"
Struggling to sit up, I pushed on, "Then I'll go find him myself..."
"Felicia," Jefferson's voice halted me, his eyes shimmering with a reddish hue.
Blinking in confusion, I asked, "What's wrong?"
"Felicia, you have to come to terms with the fact that Ernest is... gone," Conrad chimed in softly.
I nodded, a hollow laugh escaping me, "I know..."
The words felt surreal, yet I continued, "I know he's gone, that's why I want to be with him..."
Jefferson's grip on my hand tightened, causing a sharp pain. I looked at him, "Jefferson, you're hurting me."
"Felicia," his voice was raspy with emotion, "Ernest is gone. You can't see him anymore."
I stared back at him, a turmoil brewing inside me that I desperately suppressed, even going as far as to stubbornly insist, "I can, just let me go."
"Felicia," Jefferson's tone grew firmer.
But his words couldn't hold me back. I tried to pry his hand off, "Let me go."
A fierce longing surged within me, an overwhelming desire to see Ernest one more time. I needed to see him; otherwise, I feared I might lose my mind.
"You can't see him," Conrad interjected sharply, pausing before adding, "He's been... cremated."
His words stopped me cold, disbelief all over my face as I was lost for words.
"Rad," Jefferson called out softly, his hand gripping my shoulder, "Felicia, you need... to stay calm."
I diverted my gaze from Conrad to look up at Jefferson, "He didn’t mean that, right? Tell me Ernest is... he’s not really gone, right?"
"Jefferson, take me to him," I begged, ignoring Conrad's harsh truth. He was shattering the last sliver of hope I clung to.
Jefferson looked at Conrad, then back at me, "Okay, I'll take you," he said, helping me up.
As we walked, I didn't know where we were headed. Despite my refusal to accept Conrad's words, deep down, I knew he wasn't just speaking without thought, let alone lying to me.
The further we walked, the heavier my heart felt.
Before we even reached our destination, a sign stopped me in my tracks, shaking me to my core.
"Do you still want to go?" Jefferson's voice was soft, sensing my distress.
Did I want to go? Yes, I needed to.
I wanted to see Ernest one last time, even if... all that remained was a handful of ashes.
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