I was feeling emotional that the young man in my heart seemed to be gradually disappearing with time. I was glad to see how much he had matured, but there was also a feeling I couldn't quite describe.
Still, in the end, his change was a good thing for me. It was also good that the version of him in my memory was slowly fading.
Maybe one day, when I saw him, I would no longer feel complicated emotions. Maybe I would feel nothing at all, like running into an old friend I had known for years.
Perhaps by then, I could feel comfortable around him and chat casually about our children's education.
Nothing lasts forever, and not every couple would make it to the end. It was enough that we once had it.
Ava insisted on staying. Since she was also protected by Irvin, I didn't try to persuade her anymore. Soon, I left with Irvin.
After boarding the plane, he glanced at me a few times like he wanted to say something, but each time he opened his mouth, no words came out.
When he looked at me again, I turned to him and said, "Just say whatever you want to say. You don't have to hold back.
"Even though we're not together anymore, we're still friends, at least. Just speak your mind. There's no need to overthink it."
I remembered how, when we were deeply in love, a friend who had just broken up once asked me if she should stay friends with her ex-boyfriend, because he wanted to. She asked me what I would do if I ever broke up with Irvin.
Back then, I answered no without hesitation. I had always believed that it was impossible for lovers to stay friends.
The deeper the love, the more painful the breakup. It would hurt so much that they would end up wanting nothing to do with one another.
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