Hitched & Hitched Again: A Comedy of Marital Mayhem novel Chapter 1273

If Gerald wasn’t around, it was always the old lady who had to worry about everything.

The old lady was out of options, so then it fell to Quincy Howard.

Bernard and Walter were wild cards—one loved to solve problems with his fists, the other preferred to charge in with whatever weapon he could find.

Usually, if something was going down in the mountains, these two weren’t the first people you’d call.

They just waited for orders and did what they were told.

Their position among the big shots? Well, it was about as humble as Evan’s was whenever he stood in front of Elliot and Elijah.

Tarquin nodded.

“I got it. I asked Grandma for some shrooms—uh, hallucinogens. I was thinking…”

He started laying out his plan, but before he’d even finished, Bernard and Evan were already getting hyped.

“Sounds good! Solid plan! We’re in! Let’s do it!” they both chimed in, way too excited.

Tarquin: “…”

The old guy and the kid didn’t even look at him—just grinned at each other, like they were already plotting mischief.

“This is gonna be a blast,” Bernard crowed. “Wait till I ride the black bear through their camp—scare the pants off those guys!”

“Riding a bear? Pfft, just wait,” Evan shot back. “I’ve got an even bigger show planned. Oh, hey!”

Bernard turned to Tarquin. “You got any gear?”

“Uh… just the shrooms.”

Bernard shook his head. “Not enough, not even close. Evan, c’mon, time to ‘borrow’ some gear.”

“Yup!” Evan nodded so hard his baseball cap nearly fell off.

As the odd pair started to leave, Tarquin hurried to block them.

“Wait, where are you ‘borrowing’ from? What are you taking?”

“From home, obviously. And as for what—just you wait and see.”

Tarquin: “?”

Before he could get another word in, Bernard waved him off.

Still, he moved carefully, keeping an eye out for venomous snakes or creepy crawlies.

He switched on his headlamp and made his way through the thick underbrush, step by slow step.

He had no idea how long he’d been walking when—

Suddenly, something felt off.

The bugs stopped chirping, little critters scurried away, trees shuddered, the ground trembled.

The noise was huge, like a pack of giant predators was closing in—and, from the sound of it, more than just one.

Nighttime hunters were always on the prowl for food—and they were fierce.

Getting tangled up with them now made zero sense. He had bigger problems to deal with. No way he was losing time brawling with a hungry bear or wolf.

Frowning, Tarquin was about to pick up his pace when, right in front of him—

He froze in his tracks, heart hammering in his chest.

His eyes narrowed as he stared straight ahead…